Looking towards next school year

I wanted to participate in this weeks Top Ten topic of “Ten reasons I am excited about this new school year” But to be honest {and I feel horrible in saying it} I’m just not that excited about it.

Maybe because I’m still not entirely over this year. I still have the baggage of unfinished curriculum and the fact that some of that work is still sitting in their workboxes in our school room waiting for day when I dredge up enough gusto to go re-organize or convince the kiddos that schooling in July is fun.

But  most likely it’s because last year was such a struggle with Zack and school. Everyday it was like pulling teeth to get him to do his work. It didn’t matter that I was practically standing on my head juggling sight words, phonics games, math facts and read alouds to get him excited about learning. He just wasn’t.

The thought of dragging him kicking and screaming through the school day doesn’t excite me.

I have even daydreamed about putting him in school {wince}. I’m just being honest. Of course I don’t believe this is the “magic fix”, but at least I wouldn’t feel like I was to blame for his lack of love for learning, I wouldn’t feel like… I was the failure. {sigh} All those careful eyes that have silently been watching me, already questioning my judgment could turn their focus elsewhere- (If those eyes even exist). Of course I would never dare…or would I?

I take this before the Lord almost daily. I know we will get through it,  I can already hear the words of countless wise women, women whom I respect and love sharing their encouraging words and thoughts with years of homeschooling or childrearing behind them -reminding me that he is still young. I have time. Don’t stress, he will come around.

And I know that they are right. He doesn’t have to love school, as much as it kills me to say that and hurts my pride just a little…I’ll admit. But I want him to love learning. I want to find what he delights in and give him the opportunity to grow that. That will be my project for the new year.

So although I haven’t mustered up the excitement about the new year –just yet, I’m trusting that I will come around. After all, who doesn’t like a fresh start?

 

Linking up with Many Little Blessings 10 Reasons I’m excited about the new school year.

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